Animal Jokes

• Why do fish live in salt water

Pepper makes them sneeze.


• What are spiders really good at

Surfing the web.


• What do you call a magic dog

A labracadabrador.


• How does a farmer keep track of his cattle

With a cow-culator.


• What do you call an alligator detective

An investi-gator.


• Why don't they play cards in the jungle

Too many cheetahs.


• What social events do spiders love to attend

Webbings.


• What do you get from a pampered cow

Spoiled milk.


• Why aren’t koalas considered bears

They don’t have the right koala-fications.


• What do you call a well-balanced horse

Stable.


• What do you call a bear with no teeth

A gummy bear.


• What’s the smartest insect

A spelling bee!


• Where do cows go on Friday nights

The mooovies.


• How do you make a baby snake cry

Take away its rattle.


• What do you call a chicken that makes jokes

A comedihen.


• What are caterpillars scared of

Dogerpillars.


• Why didn’t the lion win the race

Because he was racing a cheetah.


• Why did the bee get married

Because she found her honey.


• Why can’t the leopard hide

Because he’s always spotted.


• What kind of jacket does an octopus wear

An army jacket.


• What sort of sandals do frogs wear

Open-toad.

I was told I needed to stop acting like a flamingo... So I put my foot down.
• Where do horses live

In neighhhhhbourhoods.


• What do you call a goat who paints pictures

Vincent Van Goat!


• Why are mice afraid of swimming

Catfish!