Food Jokes

• What do PHD students eat when they're hungry

Academia nuts.


• Why should you always knock before opening the fridge door

In case there's a salad dressing.


• Why couldn't the sesame seed stop talking

He was on a roll.


• Why do prawns never share

Because they're shellfish.


• What did the cheese say to himself in the mirror

Halloumi!


• Why did the mushroom go to the party

Because he was a fungi.


• Why did the Oreo go to the dentist

Because he lost his filling.


• What did one pickle say to the other

Dill with it.


• What food is never on time

Choco-late!


• What do you call a fake noodle

An impasta.


• What do you call a cup of coffee with a pair of trousers in it

A cupachinos.


• What do you call a beautiful pumpkin

Gourdgeous.


• How does Reese eat her ice cream

Witherspoon.


• What nuts always seem to have a cold

Cashews.


• Who is green and sings

Elvis Parsley.


• What is the favorite fruit of twins

Pears.


• What do you give to cure a sick lemon

Lemon-aid.


• What would you call a peanut in space

An astronut.

I could tell you a pizza joke… But it would probably be cheesy.
• What happens when a walnut laughs heavily

It cracks up.


• Excuse me sir, will my pizza be long

No, it’ll be round.


• What’s the saddest fruit

A blueberry.


• Where did the lettuce go for a drink

The salad bar.